Monday, May 07, 2007

Boomerang friends

Life has been moving along nicely since I relocated here in the Berkshires last August. I found an apartment and then a job and manage to see the kids often. I haven’t gotten involved in the local community enough to have established a network of new friends my age though. So, this past weekend, when I had some personal and professional issues to wrangle with, I found myself phoning old friends to just touch base and have a sounding board.

After spending time with these friends, I realize just how wonderful it is to have people in your life who are good, caring listeners - people who let you understand yourself better just by giving you the space to hear yourself think.

One friend, a colleague from my former workplace, allowed me to talk and talk tonight. It was a pretty one-sided conversation but helped me gain new insight on things which seemed a bit undefined and unsettled. I laughed and called her my “boomerang friend”.

These are the friends we all need. They allow us to come full circle by their presence and receptivity rather than by their advice.

It’s a gift to be able to put your own agenda on hold and really allow your friend to speak freely.

How many boomerang friends are in your life? Can you return the favor?


geogirl said...

I had one great friend in college who did that for me. We could talk about ANYTHING and she would let me just ramble on and on...I think I did the same for her. Sadly life moves on and so did I. I've moved around so much it's been hard keeping in touch with any of my friends from back then.

I try to be a "Boomerang Friend"(I know I am certainly the one most people at my office come to when they need to vent) but it's hard not giving advice just want to help, you know?

slouching mom said...

Yes, I have a few.

And I try to be the same kind of friend to them.

It takes a lot of forbearance and love not to chime in with advice or opinions. But I agree, it is so important a skill.

Terry said...

I'm tagging you.
The rules start with 7 random facts/habits about yourself. People who are tagged have to write their 7 things on their blog. Then choose another 7 people to get tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave them a comment to tell them they have been tagged and to read your blog.

Hanafi A. said...


to subdue very beautiful metaphor

BOSSY said...

Yes, we all need those Boomerang friends. So much better than the drop-and-kick variety.